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Hey everyone! Just wanted to catch you up what is going on in my life. After considering the pros and cons I have decided to go back to school. I had been in college since August 2007 which is right after I graduated highschool, I loved school I was taking basic classes at a Community College and loved it. I finished Community College with an Associates of Arts in Teaching degree. Then it was off to a University. Thats when things turned to crud. It was such a big change from a Community College to a University.. I guess I went into it a bit naive. The expectations were so much higher, the instructors were no longer as willing to assist, everything that had been so much easier at the College was no longer easy at the University. I also began to develop issues with anxiety. I would get so tense in class that I would have to excuse myself from the class. So the Fall semester of 2011 was the last time I have been in a school setting. That semester I went for the first day of class and had all those feelings rush back to me. The feeling of not being good enough, the overwhelming stress, feeling trapped, the feeling of defeat, etc all got to me so bad that I came home after that class crying my eyes out and confessing to my mom that I could no longer do it. I needed a break, I had no fight left in me. This was one of the hardest things I have gone through in my life. I had so many hopes and dreams for myself. I also had a huge weight on my shoulders- my parents dreams! I am the only one out of all 5 of us who has gone to college. They would constantly encourage me to keep going to school so I could have a better life and not have to go through some of the stuggles they went through (them only having a jr high and half of high school education). I felt like part of me was going to school for them. So they could be proud of me, so that maybe one day I would have my dream job and be able to help them financially. When I had to tell them that I was quitting school that was the last final blow.
But fast forward to today! I will return to that same University this time with a different major, a different goal, and God. Since all that heartache my faith in God has gotten stronger than it has ever been in my entire life. I will be part time only taking two classes and then in spring 2013 I will be transferring to a different university and finishing my bachelors online. So as of now I am in the whole re-enrolling process. But if you are the praying kind I would love that you would pray that the classes I need will still be available when I am finally cleared for registration. I spoke with a women at the university that I will be attending in spring 2013 and she said as long as I take classes that are related to my major they should all transfer. Which makes me so happy and relieved but I'm praying that classes will be available. Anyway if you are still reading this you are awesome lol, and my whole reason for posting this is because if you are like me and have your own things that you struggle with daily and you feel like you can't do something. YOU CAN!!! I know easier said than done. But with faith anything is possible at least thats what I am finding out! I know it wont be easy but if I ignore the past and change my mentality I know it is possible! Best wishes to you all!